The persistent gender gap in software engineering (SE) poses a significant challenge in a world where digital innovation is crucial to societal progress. This paper explores the underlying factors contributing to the low participation of women in SE education and careers. Through a retrospective questionnaire study, we sought to capture the experiences and perceptions that deter women from pursuing SE despite initial interest. Our findings indicate that stereotypes, misconceptions about the field, and a lack of early positive exposure influence women’s decisions regarding SE. The study reveals that barriers such as the perceived incompatibility of SE with personal interests, the daunting image of the SE work environment, and the absence of female role models are critical deterrents. Furthermore, we discuss how early and continuous engagement with computing can reshape perceptions and foster a more inclusive environment. The paper concludes with actionable recommendations, emphasizing that efforts to close the gender gap in SE should not only aim for demographic balance but also harness the full potential of diversity for driving innovation. Ultimately, the study underscores the need for systemic changes in education and policy to create a more equitable and dynamic SE landscape.